Date : Saturday, March 19, 2011
Time : 9:47 AM

Life...

Life is simple, but it’s just not easy.
In life, everyone makes mistakes, everyone falls,
but no matter how hard life goes, you just have to hang on to it,
and try to get up from the fall.

I’ve been hanging on for months. Perhaps this is the down cline moment
of my life. I believe so.
Even though I may not work hard like how the ‘nerds’ do, but somehow, work is giving me pressure. Seeing that most people around you knows and understand what’s going on,
yet you are sitting down there, catching no balls from it.
Wanted to ask for help, but sometimes it’s better for oneself to figure it out
than bothering others.

Even though I am good in keeping things to myself, but after all, I am human!
I do have emotions too! Nonstop of unluckiness, nonstop of nonsense
plus the pressure and stuffs that I already had are making me nuts!
I can’t help but to release out my emotion. You may think it’s such a small issue.
But every small issue with some bigger issues will create out an enormous bomb.
You might know part1 of the story, but it’s not the end of the story.
Even if you know the whole story, there’s still story behind the story.
You can never know a complete story from any books. Never!
And if you know what I’ve been through (but have yet to overcome it), what’s happening,
you might not be so harsh on me anymore.

Keeping silence doesn’t mean I have nothing to say. But there’s a limit for everything.
It might be 99%, and anyone who happens to hit the last 1%,
will cause the limit to explode. And once it exploded,
every single 1% that comes in is equivalent to 100% till the limit ‘machine’ is fixed again. Knowing that these are unfair to those people,
but please think if it’s fair for me too?
Is it fair for me getting all this shits?
I often think why all this shits happens on me? Why can’t it be others?
But no matter how much I think, it’s pointless.
The one and only answer is ‘this is life, and life is always unfair’.

Who don’t wish to be a perfect person with a perfect life? Everyone wished to!
But reality tells us that no one can be perfect. If I happen to be
a Happy go lucky person in the past, please don’t assume that a happy go lucky person won’t change to a sad and unlucky person.
If I have been treating you well,
please don’t take it for granted that I MUST always treat you well.
People are too used to your ‘A’,
and couldn’t bring themselves to accept that there’s a ‘B’ too.
When ‘A's’ 'battery' is down to 0%, the ‘B’ has to come out.
‘B’ can be bad, everyone including myself dislikes ‘B’,
but do you know what is the best thing about it?
It tells me that I am still not dead.
I am still living like a human with feelings and emotions.

But of course, I sincerely apologise for letting my ‘B’ out on me
and letting it to offend/hurt any of you.
Please let me pass all the given challenges ASAP.
I miss my happiness a lot!

Date : Friday, March 18, 2011
Time : 2:50 AM

What a disappointed friday.
It was my offday today , wanted to spend my day with him.
but my plan didn't went the way how i have planned!

was supposed to go to his house to accompany him
but he told me he wasnt feeling very well ,
so he need to take a short rest.
and he doesn't want to pass his cough to me.
I understand and I told him to rest first , I waited for him till i fell asleep.
Finally he text me , i thought he wanted to meet me
and head down to marina square together.

But in the end he told me he was already at suntec listening to a seminar!!!
I asked him why didnt he told he was going there
and why did he lie to me all along
and his replied was he scared that I would get angry!!!!
he seriously doesn't understand me well , if he's busy or he need to go somewhere else first
he could just tell me , I'm not like those girls , I'm not so petty......
I would understand and ask him to go ahead and do his things and after everything
he could text me to tell me that he's already free to meet me.
I would understand!!!
But in the end he choose to lie to me.

I wasnt angry because he went to suntec to listen to a seminar
or I wasn't angry because he didn't tell me.
I was just disappointed that he lied to me.

I doesn't like a guy that I like to lie to me!
I thought he was different ..
But he turns out to be like my dad , I just can't accept this.
My dad is always lying to my mom
and thats why I thought the guy that I like was different.
but ........................
haiss , Just disappointed!!!

I was disappointed till I have got no words to say to him,
in the end I have decided not to meet him.
Wasted my offday just by staying at home and was disappointed
that I didn't meet him today.
but I am the one who chose not to meet him!!

I have always wondering , am I someone that he like?
Will I have the chance to be more den just a friend with him?
What if oneday , just one fine day , I text him and tell him that I like him
and I want to be more den just a friend with him.
what would his answer be?
I want to tell him , I like him for who he is.
Doesn't matter if he's poor and doesn't matter if he's not good looking.
I like him just the way he is!!!
when would this ONE FINE DAY comes???
was just wondering!!

Date : Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Time : 12:13 PM

Its already 3.15am , just got home not long.
bathed and now im waiting for my long hair to dry!

After work , went to eat beef noodle and it was damnnnn good.
was craving for it since yesterday(:
I just simply love it ...
I dont mind eating it everyday till i gets bored of it.
anw it was at bugis so after eating we walked around bugis street to do some shopping.
as usually , girls are always girls , still love shopping.
but seriously trying to CONTROL!!!!

after shopping I went to watch BIG MAMA(:
it was damn funny , worth the watch.
we kept laughing all the way

And after movie we walk from cathey all the way back to bugis!
walked pass Cino's school and I took some photos of it and send it to him-_-"
his school is beautiful.
and there's a 15mins cafe there , i dont know what does 15mins means but
maybe they got to serve us within 15mins? I guess so!
should visit there someday
And I'm gonna stalk Cino soon!!! (JOKE)

And now HOME SWEET HOME!
I'm so tired but why cant i get to bed?? can someone put me to sleep?
i need a long good sleep tooo.
I'm just so tried , seriosuly looking forward to my off day.

Date : Monday, March 14, 2011
Time : 6:13 AM

HOME SWEET HOME
I so tired , why do i always feel tired?
but when the moment i reach home , i can't sleep-_-"
thats so funny!!!!!

I'm having my late dinner now , I'm eating waffles
bought it from YCK mrt station 7eleven.
Its good to have one 7eleven there(:

GOSH! I'm craving for the beef noodle at bugis.
Jacky is gonna bring me there tomorrow to eat again!!!
I'm sooooo in love with the beef noodle♥♥♥♥

anw daddy's new chicken rice shop will be opening tomorrow
its the 10th shop he had open(:
Congrats to him and all the best!!
I will always support him.

Date : Sunday, March 13, 2011
Time : 10:27 AM

Just got home from my aunt's house ,
was there for family day!
Sunday is always the BEST DAY, partly is because I end work early
and its because sunday is always a day for
all familys to get along together!!
♥SO I LOVE SUNDAY♥

Just texted him ,
dont know why do i always have the thoughts of messaging him.
I always told myself not to message him first ,
doesn't want to disturb him while he is doing his work.
But I just cant ,
waiting for him to message me is like waiting for my hair to grow longer!
it's just sooooo long!!!!!
I have never miss a person so much till i'm always
looking forward to receive his message every single night
just to know that he have thought of me too.
but maybe he doesn't share the same thoughts??!!!
I just dont know , it's just so difficult to read his mind.

I'm always trying to make the first move but I failed.
after all I'm still a girl , its not very nice to make the first move.
Making the first move to message him first it's already so
difficult for me to do it!
But I still wouldn't dare to make too much move
because i still cant read his mind
I dont know if he share the same thoughts like me.

So all I can do is just wait!!
wait for the time to come.
And now all i ever wish for is to know how to read people's mind(:
especially him ..........................
But it's not as easy as i thought

Date : Friday, March 11, 2011
Time : 11:41 AM

GOSH! its already 4am and I'm still bogging.

Date : Thursday, March 10, 2011
Time : 8:03 AM

back home!
I'm happy that I didnt waste my day today just by rotting at home(:

Accompany Casandra to a job interview and to her modeling agency.
After that went to Novena to meet Cino and headed to his home sweet home!
It was my first time there and i was kind of shock to see his house.
His house was amazing , very clean and very neat , very cosy too.
I love his house view!!
It really feels home ...
And not to forget , his mom! she's so cute and friendly just like that stupid boy! haha

After that we went to some where , I don't know where to have our dinner
and we watched the movie 'UNKNOWN' , nice movie ..

GOSH! why do time pass so fast during my offday!
I want it to be slower , so i can have longer time with that stupid boy ..
because he's the only one that can brighten up my day
and i wouldnt feel so lonely with him around.
I'm happy to have him around ..