Date : Saturday, March 19, 2011
Time : 9:47 AM

Life...

Life is simple, but it’s just not easy.
In life, everyone makes mistakes, everyone falls,
but no matter how hard life goes, you just have to hang on to it,
and try to get up from the fall.

I’ve been hanging on for months. Perhaps this is the down cline moment
of my life. I believe so.
Even though I may not work hard like how the ‘nerds’ do, but somehow, work is giving me pressure. Seeing that most people around you knows and understand what’s going on,
yet you are sitting down there, catching no balls from it.
Wanted to ask for help, but sometimes it’s better for oneself to figure it out
than bothering others.

Even though I am good in keeping things to myself, but after all, I am human!
I do have emotions too! Nonstop of unluckiness, nonstop of nonsense
plus the pressure and stuffs that I already had are making me nuts!
I can’t help but to release out my emotion. You may think it’s such a small issue.
But every small issue with some bigger issues will create out an enormous bomb.
You might know part1 of the story, but it’s not the end of the story.
Even if you know the whole story, there’s still story behind the story.
You can never know a complete story from any books. Never!
And if you know what I’ve been through (but have yet to overcome it), what’s happening,
you might not be so harsh on me anymore.

Keeping silence doesn’t mean I have nothing to say. But there’s a limit for everything.
It might be 99%, and anyone who happens to hit the last 1%,
will cause the limit to explode. And once it exploded,
every single 1% that comes in is equivalent to 100% till the limit ‘machine’ is fixed again. Knowing that these are unfair to those people,
but please think if it’s fair for me too?
Is it fair for me getting all this shits?
I often think why all this shits happens on me? Why can’t it be others?
But no matter how much I think, it’s pointless.
The one and only answer is ‘this is life, and life is always unfair’.

Who don’t wish to be a perfect person with a perfect life? Everyone wished to!
But reality tells us that no one can be perfect. If I happen to be
a Happy go lucky person in the past, please don’t assume that a happy go lucky person won’t change to a sad and unlucky person.
If I have been treating you well,
please don’t take it for granted that I MUST always treat you well.
People are too used to your ‘A’,
and couldn’t bring themselves to accept that there’s a ‘B’ too.
When ‘A's’ 'battery' is down to 0%, the ‘B’ has to come out.
‘B’ can be bad, everyone including myself dislikes ‘B’,
but do you know what is the best thing about it?
It tells me that I am still not dead.
I am still living like a human with feelings and emotions.

But of course, I sincerely apologise for letting my ‘B’ out on me
and letting it to offend/hurt any of you.
Please let me pass all the given challenges ASAP.
I miss my happiness a lot!